This Candle Smells Like PET ROCKS

Solid, dependable, and full of personality (or so you convinced yourself), this candle is a tribute to the greatest low-effort, high-reward pet of all time. No feeding, no walks, no tragic backyard burials—just a rock, a cardboard box, and the sheer power of 80s marketing magic. If you were one of the kids who proudly gave your rock a name and truly believed it loved you back, this one’s for you.

Light it up, and suddenly, you’re back in the 80s, carrying your beloved Pet Rock around like it had thoughts, feelings, and maybe even a little attitude.

Choose Your Signature Scent:

• Vanilla & Coconut – Smooth, sweet, and effortlessly cool—like the unshakable confidence of someone selling literal rocks to children.
• Noir Suede – Deep, earthy, and a little mysterious—like the existential crisis you had when you realized your Pet Rock wasn’t playing dead… it was just a rock.

Hand-poured with renewable plant-based wax, this candle burns for 40 hours—which is longer than the Pet Rock craze lasted (but who’s counting?).

And when the wax is gone? The candlecup sticks around for storing tiny treasures—like old-school nostalgia, childhood innocence, or whatever loose change you can scavenge from your couch cushions.

Features:

✔ Two signature scents: Vanilla & Coconut (light, sweet, and just a little ridiculous) or Noir Suede (moody, deep, and weirdly committed).
✔ Renewable plant-based wax—because your Pet Rock may not be alive, but the planet is.
✔ 40 hours of burn time—longer than it took for your parents to regret buying you a literal rock.

Pro-tip: Gift this to the 80s kid who still secretly believes their Pet Rock had a personality—or keep it for yourself, because whether you were scammed or simply ahead of your time, you deserve to bask in the glow of childhood nostalgia.

Light it up, and let This Candle Smells Like a Pet Rock remind you that sometimes, the best things in life are completely, unapologetically pointless.